Wisdom From A Convicted Murderess

Barbara Graham went to her death in San Quentin Prison's gas chamber back in 1955 for the crime of murder. Reportedly her last words were: "Good people are always so sure they're right."

I have to agree with her observation.

I do a lot of reading. It's my favorite hobby. In my efforts to be informed I try to get a good feel of the various ways of looking at things. I somewhat pity those inflated wits who never do more than reinforce their biases by refusing to stray outside the comfy confines of their pet theories.

Years ago I became distressed by the way the conservative surge here in the good ol' USA tortured logic in order to make their points. As an outlet I began looking into this by starting a blog which I called Right-wing Dumbth (borrowing the "dumbth" from the late entertainer Steve Allen, who coined that word to describe what he felt was the heights of stupidity.)

After a while I quite. I quit because I began to notice way too much left-wing dumbth. In fact, when examining any issue, one's primary task should be to winnow all the chaff of emotion from the wheat of facts.

Otherwise, we risk becoming self-righteous crusaders, dead certain we are right.

Okay, I still blog. I still give my opinions, and do it passionately at times (and probably employing a degree of dumbth that my emotions saddle me with). But I know it's there. Would that others recognized the same of themselves.

Right now this country seems to be coming apart at the seams because we are so polarized. And, in my humble opinion, this is in no small part due to goofola thinking, shoddy argumentation, and excessive emotionalism. It certainly is hard to compromise when almost everything is deemed to be so important a matter that there is no room for reconsideration.

Yet we are all so damned sure we are right! 

What's On Your Clothesline?

My late grandmother used to explain it this way: If everybody put all their problems out in the open the way they hang their clothes in the backyard on a clothesline, everyone - after inspecting everyone else's - would still come back and choose their own. (Mind you, she was saying that back in those rough depression and WW ll days, when everyone was struggling and said laundry would be threadbare, patched, and hopelessly stained or faded; you could pretty much tell who was in the worst financial shape by the laundry.)

When I was a child my mom had it rough. She is temperamentally "high strung" by nature. She cared for both her parents until they died, and at the same time was raising her own three kids while Dad went out and earned the bacon. Eventually she wound up "hooked" on "nerve pills" while trying to cope. Those were very unhappy times for her and all of us. I remember her complaining constantly about the "hell" she went through at home (young kids can provide that for a parent, especially if their nerves are jangled already). We would sometimes drive down the streets on our way to church or the store and my mom would watch the houses go by and lament, "I wonder how much hell goes on in that home and that one and...." Sure, they might be all nice and tidy to all appearances from the outside. Still she wondered if the insides were full of fights and turmoil.

Recently I was reminded of those sad days while I was driving down the road with my lady friend as she was discussing how dysfunctional her family life is (and believe me, it really is). She said everybody's life has forms of craziness; everyone has at least some family tragedy or dysfunction (this, too, was said as we drove down the road looking at homes).

As I worked today I listened to my coworkers as they discussed the various problems facing them in their private lives. I thought about Grandmother. We have these problems and we somehow deal with them. We "inspect" other's laundry by airing our problems. No one seems to wish to exchange problems - not really. Our pain is a part of us.

I've often said it and I do believe it, that in my life so far I've had more than my share of good fortune and good health. Maybe I never had very high expectations of life. I was born into poverty, I'm not living hand-to-mouth now but know where my next meal is coming from and am at least financially solvent. It could all be swept away tomorrow, but it doesn't take much to make me happy. I think as long as I have a roof over my head, a place to sleep, something to eat, a ride to get me where I'm going, and maybe my old guitar, I will be fine.

I realize now that the busier your life is, the more crowded with proverbial "irons in the fire," the more potential there is for zaniness and unhappiness. Some folks can stand more stress than others. I notice the older I get the less stomach I have for pressure situations. I'm happiest now focusing on the basics and learning to accept the thousands of things that are just out of my control.

But that's me. Your laundry is okay, I suppose, while mine may show some wear and appear plain, but it's mine and I'll take it.

Root Of Evil

"For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil (I Timothy 6:10, NIV)." Indeed. How I abhor the fact that our culture forces upon me the need to be so mindful of mammon.

I have savings accounts that I have been socking money into because I have to be prepared for emergencies, and because I don't want to face old age practically resourceless. It's not as much as it could have been had I ignored people needing help or family members who have no one else to help them. But I suppose that if society were a kinder place, where human need was not in constant play against human greed, the ranks of the needy would be greatly reduced.

I'm just saying that it bothers me that every time I consider helping others I have to consider how it will impact my own life. It's not purely selfish motives at play here. If we can avoid being a burden to others it will help those others

.

I'm shocked to find that today there are still between 20 and 30 million people (I've seen various estimates) who are still in slavery. Wikipedia states that most of these slaves are in South Asia, where debt bondage flourishes. Could anything other than viral greed be back of this?

My own country, the United States, has a very ugly history with slavery. That because the wealthy wanted to retain their wealth and gain ever greater wealth from the labor of others. We may have ridded our economic system of that "peculiar institution," but it has been replaced now by wage slavery - a system whereby the common laborer must lose more and more freedom, face greater health and safety risks, work harder than ever for less pay, as their "masters," the greedy CEOs, makes over three hundred times their wages.

Not to get all political here, but has anyone else noticed how dutifully the media reports on our legislators who fear increasing the minimum wage will put a strain on companies and result in lower levels of employment, while ignoring the fact that reining in CEO perks and pay would allow a fairer, healthier system overall? A company could remain profitable, probably more so, if better wages were paid the workers from the overabundance of the CEOs.

I ranted last time about the medical establishment. Again, I see the love of money as the taproot of the problem. The healing arts once was a ministry for the good of humankind. Now it has become another vehicle for financiers to gain wealth off the suffering of others.

When I was a baby President Eisenhower left office and in his farewell address warned us to beware what he called the military-industrial complex. We obviously didn't listen, because war is big business now and our leaders seem ever desirous to keep us at war, thus feeding the machine.

Hey yeah, politics. It has been said that we in the US have the best democracy money can buy. Follow the money. See how many big corporations and lobbies contribute to candidates from both parties (and why must we saddled with this two-party system anyway?) so that whoever wins will be beholden to them. In our democratic aristocracy we find that for the first time in history the majority of our Congress is made up of millionaires. Can that be a good thing?

In this day and age might makes right. Might being mammon, there. Our media are controlled by the wealthy corporations. Can we get the straight dope on anything anymore? Investigative reporting has taken a back seat to fluff reporting that keeps the ratings high and cash flowing in. Too much commentary and not enough straight reporting, because the sheeple must trained, not educated and informed.

I could go on and on. But what to do besides bitch and moan? Well, I try as much as possible to live life on my own terms. As for my own wage slavery, my savings allows me to opt out of some forms (but not all!) of overtime I might otherwise feel obliged to accept. It shields me from many abuses. I have the option of taking a lesser paying, lesser nerve-rattling position. That l have not considered yet because I still have my elderly mother to look out for, but one day....

I am now proudly debt-free and hope to stay that way barring any health crisis. My savings should take care of most other emergencies. For years now I have lived a life of voluntary simplicity and have become quite the critic of consumerism. The Joneses can kiss my ass and so can anyone else who looks down on my frugality. As much as I try to help others I can't help chiding them if I perceive they are putting their own necks in the noose. I don't give anyone the shirt off my back without first inquiring how they came to have no shirt. Sadly, most of those in need just haven't cultivated the fortitude to make the hard choices necessary to gain more freedom. And yes, I realize this is easier to do for a bachelor such as me than for a married person with kids. But everyone can simplify and avoid the keep-up-with trap.

Lastly, I think knowledge is power. The more knowledge you have the more tools you have. The problem is getting good, unbiased information. That is very, very difficult. Everyone has an angle and a vested interest. But it helps to keep an open mind and not be troubled about going against the "common knowledge" and accepted wisdom. Experts are often wrong. Still, we would be fools to ignore what they say. I just think we would be fools to place authorities on pedestals and not question anything. Anyone who has studied the history of any body of knowledge cannot help but see that time brings more light and revises old theories.

I often marvel how money has no value besides that placed upon it by the human imagination. The lower animals get along well without because they operate under another system. (A mouse would shred hidden paper money because it desires a comfy bed over a savings account.) I think the less we can worship money, the less we are forced to depend on it, the more we can eliminate our lust for it, the happier overall we will be. Kinder, too. As I said, I hate being forced to hoard what money I do, because, speaking frankly, it is almost impossible to get along without it in our system of doing things. I know I can't change the system but can only adjust myself to make the best of it.

As I Was Saying...

Life recently dealt me some curve balls that necessitated a blogging break. But for me blogging as an emotional outlet blogging is hard to beat. That, and the longing for fellowship with my cyber friends is calling me back to my blog, although I have no idea how frequent my dribblings will be.

I see I left off talking about how science is often put on a pedestal. It isn't that I am anti-science. Not at all. However, I am one of those who believe the "modern scientific worldview" isn't necessarily the final answer. I'm a thoroughgoing skeptic.

Along this line, I have been paying increasing attention as the years roll by to the subjects of health and healthcare. I'm getting more intimately involved in the details of my mother's health issues and her ten doctor-prescribed medications. My younger brother (early fifties) is now on seven doctor-prescribed meds and happens to be married to a nurse. He is forever urging me to get to the doctor and "get checked out," even though I have no apparent health issues other than normal wear and tear of my age. My last physical (admittedly a few years ago now) showed me completely normal for my age.

Not to get al TMI or anything, but I have, as is common in men my age, a slightly enlarged prostate gland. My brother, however, is taking a prescription for that. His doctor also put him on treatment for decreased testosterone. He also takes pills for cholesterol, for high blood pressure, for pain after a recent neck surgery, for anxiety, and for I don't know what all else. My head was just spinning by that time. I told him when I do choose to see a doctor I want to see a doctor and not a pusher. Sometimes I wonder if that is even possible anymore.

I had a severe prostate infection several years ago which I dealt with by going to the doctor. After a rather painful examination (which left me bent over the examining table, clutching the other side in pain while shouting obscenities), I was given a butt-shot of antibiotics and then a course of oral antibiotics. I was back to normal within a few days.

Last year I started getting those same symptoms again and recognized what was heading my way. I went down to the local pharmacy and examined their over-the counter prostrate health formulas, settling on one that I have been taking ever since (which I am not going to plug here), purchased some Vitamin C (and took several times above the RDA), and also picked up some cranberry pills to flush my kidneys and hopefully prevent a UTI if I didn't already have one (which is what I thought might up at first). I "cured" myself within the week.

Now I don't write this to encourage others to do as I did. But I would urge everyone to keep abreast of what's going on in the world of medicine and healthcare. And I would ABSOLUTELY SUGGEST YOU TAKE CONTROL OF YOUR OWN HEALTHCARE and not just place it uncritically in the hands of physicians.

When I saw my brother this past weekend at the emergency room as we were there with our mom (I called him off his job), I noticed his hands were so swollen you couldn't see his knuckles. He couldn't bend his fingers but with great difficulty. His ankles, he told me, were swollen as well. "What's up with that?" I asked. I was informed his doctor had recently changed his high blood pressure medicine. His doctor advised him to check back with him in six or eight weeks. I suggested he not wait that long. Heck, I guess he now needs a prescription for a diuretic (his other hypertension pill supposedly contained one).

I may be wrong of course, but I remember a time before my brother got "in the medical system" that he didn't take medicine. He is now grossly overweight, which suspiciously started about the time he began treatment for his "low-T." Hmmmm. Now, to be honest, like many of us older folks, he had packed on some extra pounds over the years, but after his testosterone treatment he seems to be working towards a job playing Santa at the malls.

It has been my experience with friends and family that once the doctor gets out his pad and starts writing these damned prescriptions, inevitably one will follow another. This med has side effects that require another med, and so on. That's another thing I do. When I'm with my mom at the various doctor's offices she goes to I can't resist reading the magazines there, with all their fulll-page ads for many wondrous treatments that are available now via the wonder of modern science. Then there among all these sleek ads with pretty pictures of people living "active" lives, supposedly after treatment with the wonder drug, and the large type extolling the virtues of said treatment, there will be some small print which lists possible side effects. Man! Ever read those? Hell, the cure is sometimes worse than the disease.

Perhaps this sounds like an angry screed against modern medicine. I don't mean for it to. But I do think modern doctors are too into treating symptoms and not enough into basic health building, as per nutrition, for example. Simple correctives probably get overlooked because it's simpler to prescribe a pill (and then another and another to deal with side effects).

If my brother had lost twenty pounds before he got "into the system" might that have lowered his blood pressure enough and improved his cholesterol readings (and here I will state that I have come to question much of the modern thinking about how cholesterol affects coronary disease, but that's another story) that prescriptions would not have been indicated?

Again, I don't blame the pill pushers totally because I believe we have minds of our own and allow ourselves to be duped into thinking there is a shot or pill that will take care of any problem. Advertising sways us (not just with medicines, but everything) way more than it should. I don't care for such string-pulling and turn a skeptical eye towards all advertising (just what do pretty girls have to do with automobiles, anyway?).

In a time when people find "jogging in a jar" an attractive substitute for actual physical activity, and taking supplements easier than actually eating right, it doesn't surprise me that there are so many pill junkies around. When I was growing up people were taking acid and smoking pot to get their kicks. Now prescription painkillers are the big deal, and "pill mills" flourish because of it. And I have personally known people who made their living, or at least supplemented it, by going to the various doctors who blithely supply them meds which they turn around and sale to others for a profit.

Now I started out in the system and just found myself increasingly at odds with my doctor. But wait! He is an authority. Shouldn't I trust him totally with my health? I don't feel so inclined. It's like the old joke:

Q - Know the difference between God and doctors?

A - God doesn't think he's a doctor.

Once during a physical I complained of some occasional chest pain. I felt (and ten years later still feel) that I was correct in attributing it to certain activities on my job (moving around a hand crane loaded with coils of steel weighing hundreds of pounds). My doctor insisted I take a Thallium Stress Test. I know, I know, better safe than sorry. But I just felt I knew me and my body at least a bit better than my doctor did, so I flatly refused. Doctors certainly don't like it when you disagree with them! I'm still here, by the way, and haven't been treated for heart disease.

The only recommendations I will make are that everyone should take an active part in their health maintenance and health care. Stay informed of what's going on. Stay in tune with your body. And for heaven's sake, take all the all the latest breakthrough reports in the field of health with at least a moderately skeptical eye. Learn enough about nutrition to make wise choices in the nourishing of your body. Walk and/or perform whatever exercise is practical in your circumstances ( my 81-year-old mom is wanting to learn Tai Chi; so cool!). Finally, I'm one of those who believe in the placebo effect. A healthy mind can assist in maintaining a healthy body.

Back in the "olden days" people didn't run to the doctor every time they had a sniffle, pain, or ache. And people still managed to make it to old age, despite the modern BS that we are living so much longer these days and "75 is the new fifty." (My great, great grandmother, a full-blooded Cherokee, lived to be 105, and most of my grandparents and great grandparents survived well past the biblical three score and ten years - and I don't think my family is unusual) I question the value of many medical tests, especially the idea that we should constantly be looking for the next health crisis lurking somewhere in our system. That can get really expensive. So can so-called preventive medicine and "borderline" illnesses. Oh, well, that's my rant for this time.